No

No.

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That 2 letter word can be powerful.  It can also be freeing and empowering.  Well unless it was said to a marriage proposal or something pretty important, in which case I recommend you run far, far away.

Look, we tend to reluctantly agree to do things we really don’t want to or have the time for.

I don’t consider myself a “yes” person or people pleaser, but sometimes I find myself committing to something I really don’t want to do.  Before I even realize what’s going on, I’ve already said yes.

A while back I was offered a promotion.  More hours, working uber cool events, more scrilla.  I mean, who doesn’t need a couple extra duckets?  Bill Gate’s and the like, you are not allowed to comment on this.

Without really thinking it through, I said yes.

The more I thought about it, the more it didn’t make sense.  I’d miss out on more time with my favorite dude, have to work nights and we all know after 8pm this grandma has to bust out toothpicks to hold up her eyelids up.  Plus I’d be inside and large crowds are not really my thing.  I’m much happier being outside with the boys.

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So I graciously declined and have been insanely happy with my decision ever since.  There were no hard feelings and I think I even earned a little more respect from my boss.  I know my strengths, I know what I’m good at, I know my priorities, I know I am right where I need to be.  And I know that position was not a good fit for me or my family.  And that’s 100% okay.

The point of the story is to encourage you to say no a little more often.  Don’t commit to something big without thinking it through or out of obligation or “feelings.”  Screw feelings, do what is best for you and your family.  Period.

Saying no will free up more time to:

  • Spend with your family
  • Take care of errands
  • Get ahead on another project
  • Go to lunch with a friend or your other half
  • Take the pup for a nice long walk
  • Hit up the grocery store
  • Get a pedicure
  • Run
  • Drink coffee
  • Do nothing at all

It’s YOUR time, you get to choose how it’s spent and what it’s worth.  Do not feel bad or guilty about it.  If others are offended with your decisions, that’s their problem.  Not yours.

I think you will feel so empowered by that two letter word, you might want to use it more often.  And you should.

Feel free to share your thoughts on this.

What are some things you need to start saying no to?

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21 Comments on “No

  1. I am so guilty of saying “yes” to too many things and people. I hate to disappoint people but if I say “yes” too often, I end up disappointing myself. I really value my “me time” when I can do what I want and not feel guilty that I’m not doing something else. Thanks for sharing!

    • You should never feel guilty about how you spend your time. I have more respect for people who know their priorities. Great job doing your thing!

  2. Do you know what I need to say NO to more often? Guest posts on blogging. Blog round ups. Blog events in general. I have a life outside of blogging, and I would like for it to stay that way! Thanks for this reminder. I so needed it.

    • I feel the same exact way. There is nothing wrong with turning down extra blog work to strip cupcakes. 😉 PS when is your cookbook coming out? We all know I don’t cook, but I’d totally buy yours!

  3. Love it! I have a hard time saying no to people, especially at work. I end up doing favor after favor and then I end up staying late and skipping lunch. My manager has even told me, it’s okay to say no. Something I’m working on this year 🙂

  4. I have a hard time saying no too. I feel so guilty and try to be everything to everyone all the time…which leaves me disappointed in myself. I really like my alone time and find I have less and less of it these days because I commit to so many other things.

  5. I totally struggle with feeling guilty and saying yea even when it’s not what’s best for me. I really need to work on it because I’m spreading myself way too thin.

  6. This was one of my goals for the new year. I was working WAY too much. You need to time for you and your familia also just balance in one’s life is so important. If you’re always saying yes it’s hard to achieve that. I’m still really struggling to find balance but I’m getting closer. Great post, chica

  7. It took me years to learn that lesson but in the past couple of years I’ve gotten better at saying NO to things that will just take away from the stuff I really want to spend my time on.
    Glad you were able to say NO and not cause any issues at your work.

  8. I’m definitely a “I’ll have to think about it” person. I rarely say yes or no right off the bat. I ALWAYS run ideas by Gary, not to get his blessing or okay, but to get his perspective. I tend to want to say no if it’ll take away from OUR time, but if it’s something that cute into ME time, I tend to say yes, and Gary pulls me back to reality.
    Good for you to change your mind and do what’s best for YOU! 🙂

  9. Oh man, I am totally learning this lesson! I am a people pleaser as well, and I am finally learning that saying yes, is creating my stressed sense of being. Saying no is so empowering 🙂 Kudos to you for knowing yourself and what works best for you and your family!

  10. i LOVE this post. i think it’s your best one yet. thanks for the reminder. 🙂

  11. I completely agree with this! Someone once told me “when you say yes to something, you are saying no to something else.” I’m super happy that you were able to make that distinction in your life!

  12. I am a yes person. I love to have a full calendar and feel a little insignificant when I don’t. Too bad it makes the boy feel insignificant when I DO have a full calendar. Saying no is something I have to work on every day.

  13. I am guilty of not being able to say no. I want to do anything anyone asks me and I will drive myself crazy before I take a break. I am really working on this! Thanks for this post – I needed it today!

  14. AH, this blog post is great! Thanks for pointing out that you shouldn’t feel bad for saying no. In the past, I have had such a hard time saying no that I would end up double booking myself somedays…I have gotten better about saying no, but still end up in double booking situations sometimes!

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